(You can email Amy Dickinson at or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Encourage them to talk about their mom whenever they want to and in any context.Īnd you and your wife should freely share happy memories of her, show them childhood photos if they’re interested, and be as centered and stalwart as you are able.ĭear Amy: Regarding the question from “Canine Questions” regarding her boyfriend, who lets his dog roam free, I work with animal control officers who have to go out and talk to people like this gentleman who refuses to contain his dog per the regulations of the city or county he lives in.Įvery single city or county in this country has a rule where all dogs must be leashed or contained in areas when outside, up to date on rabies, and licensed.ĭear Concerned: This also presents considerable risk to the dog, other animals, and humans. Establish rituals and routines that they can snuggle into. I hope that you and your wife can offer these children a port in the storm. This classic picture book might seem a little “young” for your 10-year-old grandchildren, but its message about the love that binds us should resonate with all of you. The hospital that treated your daughter-in-law should have recommendations for local in-person or virtual grief groups.įor the children, you might want to introduce them to the book, “The Invisible String, written by Patrice Karst and illustrated by Joanne Lew-Kriethoff (current edition, 2018, Little Brown). It would be appropriate for all grieving family members to attend grief counseling, as soon as possible, and to continue with counseling for as long as they want. I hope you will be able to stay calm, centered and compassionate toward all three generations.
To a certain extent, you will need to let the reeling happen, and not try to fix it. They did not get to see their mother while she was hospitalized.ĭear Concerned: Your entire family must be reeling. When would it be appropriate for them to start grief counseling, since it seems the twins need to gain perspective regarding the sudden loss of their mother. She was only 46 years old, and in fair health until she recently developed back pain and then difficulty walking.Īt any rate, she had a husband and two 10-year-old twin children. One possible compromise is that you might fly this flag for a period during June, which is LGBTQ Pride month.ĭear Amy: My wife’s daughter just died two days before this past Christmas due to liver and kidney failure, following a hospital stay of 20 days, mostly in the ICU and under intubation. We also agree that if you ultimately don’t want to display it, you shouldn’t. Zack and I agree that once you communicate about this and know more about the intent, you could make a decision. Does she feel like she needs more support from them, and if so, what does that need to look like?”
He responds: “First, the parents need to talk to each other: What is their hesitation to put out the flag? Are they concerned about how neighbors will react? Do they not want to have to explain or defend it to others? I asked my friend Zack Ford to weigh in (Zack most recently covered LGBTQ issues for ThinkProgress). And it took off.Digital Replica Edition Home Page Close MenuĪsk Amy: Dad wants eviction, not connection And I made a couple flags actually, but this one I submitted to a blog on Tumblr about genderfluidity and gender fluid people.
"I wouldn’t call myself an artist, but I’ve dabbled with drawing and bits of Photoshop, so I decided to create it myself. I found genderfluid to be fitting but was disappointed with the lack of symbolic representation," Poole said. At the time I knew genderqueer fit me, but it still felt too broad. "I had been trying to find an identity that fit me. In an interview with Majestic Mess Designs, Poole said they created the flag because genderfluidity lacked a symbol and the term "genderqueer" didn't exactly fit. Purple: Represents both masculinity and feminity The flag was created by JJ Poole in 2012 according to OutRight Action International. How often someone's identity shifts depends on the individual. People who are genderfluid don't identify with one gender, but rather their gender identity shifts between male, female, or somewhere else on the spectrum.